I'm a huge fan of violent sports, and organized child abuse has always been my favorite genre. My two boys will tell you, I specialized in haymakers and kidney punches, and I did it with relish.
Not since the 400 meter downhill spouse beating event of 1965 have I been this excited about a new way to inflict pain competitively. MMATP (Mixed martial arts toddler pummeling) is just the sort of thing I can get behind.
Won't you join us in promoting good, clean family fun?