Sunday 28 September 2008

Thoughts of the Week (Week 3)

Hey. T3PO here with another edition of "Thoughts of the Week".
  • This IOTM race is tight. I wonder what will happen if it's a tie...
  • Readmesoon deserves to run away with next months' IOTM. He is a beast, flat out.
  • I'll ask the questions here! Gameshow is awesome. And I got half a point!
  • All of the haters of "Interviewing Your Shelf", shut up. That is so funny.
  • "Are you Freaking Kidding Me?" Is queued. Yea.
  • I want an epic...
A Day in the Life of a Golf Ball, by Readmesoon

"I got on the bus sat down and by the time I arrived at my destination it felt like I had been fucked up the arse." --From Public Transportation by Avril Troll


Thursday 25 September 2008


Illogicopedia in the general blogosphere. That is to say, linkage from other blargs, sorry, blogs, on that massive web type thing.
The blogosphere is a massive sphere that, if you touch, you die. -- Francis E Dec's smart Alec friend
Well, not exactly... you see, the blogosphere is actually a hunking great pink elephant that will eat you... [is cut]

Sigh. Just click the links.
And a special mention for T3PO's blog which he just launched.

Ugh, bring the brain medicine... my sanity is fading fast.

Monday 22 September 2008

Oh my God!

From IMDB:
Revealing mistakes: When Sarah, John and the Terminator are in Dyson's house explaining the whole scenario, the Terminator cuts his arm open with a knife to prove he's a robot. The actor's real arm is clearly seen hiding under his shirt near his stomach.

Well, bet you didn't know that.

Thoughts of the Week (Week 2)

Sorry this didn't come out on Saturday (Was at a baseball game all day) but here's the second edition of THOUGHTS OF THE WEEK! A T3PO production. THOUGHTS!
  • Letters to the Editor is FINALLY finished! :-) ((VOTE FOR IT))
  • I'm sick of seeing no one on IRC other than Seppy and SomeWHAT!? I know most of you live in different time zones but try to get on... I'm not that boring....
  • Oh my God, Terminator just cut his arm open!
  • WTF was that?
  • Turnips is awesome. Tryin' to get some more of my series, Teh Comikz.
  • I don't have any more thoughts...
"Good Day to You Sir"
((Wow.. another mwow513 article... He's good...))


Saturday 20 September 2008

Illogi Classics - #18, A Hamster on a Keyboard

More unfeatured classics from the Illogicopedia archives.

Of course, Illogicopedia would never sink to such lows as featuring the work of a hamster... or would it?! The first genuine Illogicopedia article written by an animal, you might say that "Hamster on a Keyboard" introduced a novel way of generating gibberish. However, we are not the ones to judge the works of hamsters: their societies and life goals are completely different to your average Illogicopedia reader. Bear this in mind when reading and you will surely understand why this is a classic.

The writer of the article, one Mr. Keyboard Hamster, would like to inform you that he would like some water. He is, though, apparenly a master amongst hamster novelists. Fonchezzz's hamster, in three attempts, could only produce the letter 'h', proving that hamster prose such as this only comes along once in a while.

The spin off article Hamster on a Keyboard (phenomenon) relates to hamster literature in a wider sense and how you can see if your hamster is indeed a genius.

Friday 19 September 2008

Muffins: Fact or Fiction?

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I hope you are all seated comfortably in soft computer chairs (rather than computer chairs covered in razorwire and something else sharp).

I have come to you tonight to discuss a very serious matter with you all. It has come to my attention that the muffin, previously believed to be a delicious, soft, fluffy, delightful snack, might not exist at all.

Perhaps they are a government conspiracy. Perhaps they are suicidal aliens who want to be eaten (and killed) -- so they disguised themselves as food. But you should be aware that the muffins in your kitchen may not be real items of food.

Illusions. Whisps of myth. Shadow. Scientists are searching for the elusive muffin now in forests and other places we didn't build so are angry at them. I hope someone gets a picture of one and dissects it. Camera lens.

Thank you for attending tonight's seminar on the existence of Muffins. Tomorrow, I will swallow a laptop computer while being flogged, burned and otherwise abused for your entertainment. Enter what?

Brought to you by THE. Originally from an Illogicopedia article.

Illogicopedia banners - show your support!

This is a reminder of the fact you can add specially produced Illogicopedia banners to your website or forum. Feel free to link to Illogic too, and just maybe we'll make your site a featured webpage.

For more info, see here.

More from WikiHowl

Many of you will know about WikiHowl by now: it's a place where deleted, but interesting WikiHow articles find a new home (see here for more info). It's pretty funny too, and there's a bunch of new articles ready for you:
Excerpt from How to Prepare for the Raptor Apocolypse:

We all know it, the raptors are coming. Denying it will only solidify your position as raptor food in the coming years. It's only a matter of time before some drunken and/or insane geneticist thinks it's a brilliant idea to recreate living raptors from some DNA he found lying around in his basement. So why not be prepared?

All this and a load more can be found at

Tuesday 16 September 2008

Turnips #5

Huge Bob's latest instalment of his cartoon strip.

Awesome, eh? For more, see here.

Surreal stuff

Way before Illogicopedia there was an avant garde poetry magazine running from the 60's to the 70's and was called L=A=N=G=U=A=G=E and it did the same thing as we're doing now. I found it while I was on a Wikipedia spree, basically just browsing it until I find something interesting in external links. So take a look and see that we aren't the only ones typing down manic schizophasia and we surely won't be the last.

Asemic writing is interesting too!

Monday 15 September 2008

Turnips update (not necessary)

The illogi cartoon strip Turnips is in its "experimental" stage at the moment and not really taking shape in terms of story lines. But eventually I'm gonna think up some better scripts.

During the 1920's and 30's there was a groundbreaking comic strip called Krazy Kat and it involved the adventures of a mouse and a cat living out their lives in surreal, desert like and dream like environments. This was parodied again in Frank but with a more hallucinogenic quality to it. This is basically where my inspiration comes from. I'm quite enthusiastic about comics history. Bonjour y'all!

Sunday 14 September 2008


As many of you know, we have been having Avril Lavigne edits. This means we have ED vandals attacking left and right. Unfortunately this guy is a professional vandal, or as Hindleyite says, "A professional Tvatt." After going to the vandal and talking to him on IRC in private this is what I found out:
  • The vandalizing is just for fun, nothing personal.
  • The user has been a vandal since 2001.
  • The Vandal has a Avril Lavigne obsession. (obviously)
Most importantly, The user wishes to join for real, without vandalizing... or so he says. I suggest we let Avril Troll have a chance. Though it isn't really likely, this troll could actually have a nice side, and maybe could be a true helpful member of the site. Just look at Ryan. He is a former Vanity crazed user. So tell me what your thoughts are. Does he deserve another chance?

Message from your friendly admins: please do not feed the vandals. Danke Schon.

Saturday 13 September 2008

T3PO's Thoughts of the Week (Week 1)

Hey T3PO here. This is a new IllogiBlog segment every Saturday where I share my thoughts about ?pedia and other crap.

  • IllogiToons is a great project (Wish I had a working scanner...)
  • IllogiWorld NEEDS contributors
  • People need to make more Halloween Fables
  • Thanks to Emperor Metalflower for nomming my article "Are You Freaking Kidding Me?"
  • I'm sick of looking at dead IRC after 4:30am EST. (Seppy your good to talk to but..)
  • I can't write Randumb articles ((EVIDENCE!!))
  • Peesmell comes from PEE!
"What Happened to Ol' Mr. Brown?"


Friday 12 September 2008

The (Fear) Arousing Hallowe'en Fables!

Hey, this is MrMetalFLower's first post on the ?blog after realising he hadn't posted before...

Anyway, yeah...

Following in the footsteps of the recently-finished "pickle awards" comes a hallowe'en edition, the (Fear) Arousing Hallowe'en Fables. The idea is that anyone who enters writes the best possible illogical "scary" story they can, and the judges decide who wins. The winner, along with runners-up and honourable mentions, gets a big place on the front page in a hallowe'en main page reskin.

So, what do we want? Well, unlike most of the competitions we've had, the biggest thing we're looking for is high quality articles. This means that we want the article to be well-thought-out, imaginative, in full prose and cohesive. To get this, the minimum word count for your article is 1,250 words, and to make it fair in case people feel inclined to make 10-yr-long epics that obviously win, the maximum is 2,500. Basically what we want is the coolest possible Hallowe'en stories to broadcast on teh interwebs.

The judges are all ready, so all we need is your articles. The competition opened on the 6th of September and closes on the 22nd of October, giving you plenty of time to write your best possible stories. Good luck!

Book review: the day of the triffids

What is common with many post apocalyptic novels is that they show the stagnation of society and ethics. The human race quickly turns into savages, with no morals and only the fundamental will to survive which is prevalent with most species on earth. Vintage British sc-fi, The Day of the Triffids is no exception.

Bill Masen has woke up from his hospital bed to discover that everyone is blind except him. The reason for this mass blindness was a green tinted meteor shower that nearly everyone saw. It harks back to War of the worlds and even influenced the opening scenes of 28 days later. It also seems that John Wyndham (writer) is being coy in that he is using the triffids as a metaphor for the soviets during that time and the cold war. Indeed it is a cold war book, written at a time of much suspicion and underhandedness. Wyndham himself used the communist "threat" in most of his novels.

SPOILER ALERT: as the book goes on, Bill finds pockets of sighted people and forms groups with them, but these groups quickly turn into gangs which are hungry and fighting for food. At the end of the book, it kind of leaves you guessing whether mankind will pull itself back from the brink or just flicker like a flame and die out. And there is much chance of humans dying out at this time of global warming, Iran and cheese.

Fact: there have been 45000 extinctions in earth's natural history. Thankew.

Thursday 11 September 2008

Ay up!

Er... I'm new? That's all I can say right now for I am being chased by a rhino! Pygmy rhino.

Turnips #1 and #2

Huge Bob, our resident scribbler, proudly presents his new comic strip 'Turnips'.

Check out the IllogiToons project page for more toons and upcoming Nazi cartoon capers with Turnips.

Sunday 7 September 2008

The IllogiFrenzy!

Wake up! Lets go on a IllogiFrenzy! What is an IllogiFrenzy? It's a frenzy of high quality articles, collabs, everything! What is its purpose? To make ?Pedia more interesting! I'm going on an IllogiFrenzy so who wants to join me?


Saturday 6 September 2008


Hey what's up? It's me T3canolis AKA T3PO. I'll be posting some blogs here about things I'm doing or any full-scale projects. I'm just here to keep you updated. Right now SomeWHAT!? number two, Fonchezzz, Readmesoon and I are currently working on a project called "Letters to the Editor" . If you wish to join, ask on my talk page.


Monday 1 September 2008

New video!

Want to see illogiTV's newest video? How about a bunch of plastic figures getting brutally massacred. What could be more entertaining?

To see on YouTube click here.

An apology for ?pedia

Joey, author of ''On Equilibrium'', says that most non-fiction writing is eventually strange, blinkered, and pedantic from the perspective of later readers. Look at the baseless racism of much writing throughout history. Who knows what prejudice and lack of foresight will be seen in the writing of today? It's not only straight writing that suffers from this problem: even satire suffers from it, as the "truths" its ironies denote are also subject to the corrupting influences of cultural context.

Faced with sensible writing's many unsavoury meanings, the obvious solution is to rebel, to write things that mean almost nothing. With illogic instead of logic as the object, pieces of writing are incomprehensible at the time they were written, and their prestigiously intentional stupidity can only increase over time.

So keep going, Illogicopedians! You're the saviours of literature!

This post brought to you by I forgot, writer of such esteemed works as Mr Smith Goes to Washington and Selective Anterograde Amnesia. Originally posted on Illogicopedia.

IllogiTV @ WorldTV

IllogiTV videos can now be accessed at, along with a selection of YouTube favourites. Illogicopedian created content, including the "Illogicopedia Gallery" and "An Illogicopedia User Guide" is spliced with other random stuff such as "The OMG Scary Alien" and "Monkey on a Pushbike". Pure mentalism.

Watch now: see the channel here.

As ever, the YouTube channel is also here.