Friday 11 January 2019

12 Years of Illogicopedia


Forged in the Golden Age of Humour Wikis, Illogicopedia remains at the forefront of Internet nonsense some twelve years later.

Back in 2005, Wikipedia jettisoned its humorous content to the Uncyclopedia, a shameless parody of the original free encyclopedia.

This in turn spawned Illogicopedia, which was first established at Wikia Scratchpad in late 2006. And just as Uncyc was born out of content restriction, Illogicopedia heralded a new dawn in inclusionism with its generous acceptance policy.

So it remains to this day - deletion is reserved for the very worst offenders. Even spam is salvaged, re-grilled and served with chopped bananas in the after dinner 'Nose Collection'. 

While the aforementioned Golden Age passed some years ago, Illogicopedia powers ahead into a new era. An era free of drama and destructive vandalism. An era that will usher in hologram television, personal hover boards and the Ultimate Sandwich.

Until they inevitably arrive, our newly-established Discord server will satiate our desire for conversation, providing the glue to keep Illogicopedia rolling through vandal attacks and server outages.

Aid Epoc Igolli! Acid Pile Igloo! Ideological Pi!

Thursday 10 January 2019

Spambots Rule Illogiblog in 2019


A new year, a new trash can full of burning spam on the Illogiblog.
Fans of salty meat substitute will be pleased to hear that in 2019, we still get at least forty of these tasty treats every week.

Not even the porky pong of their smouldering comrades can stop the spammers' barrage of artificially generated pseudo-conversation. Mr Takeshi, bring on the next batch of brave moronic contenders forlornly hoping to survive the bonfire.
Thank you, the article is very petrifying, hopefully it can be useful for everyone. -- Yesi Nurazizah
The Illogiblog is 'petrifying'? Finally, a spambot with a nose for nonsense. You are the very first of your kind to dispense with the flowery greetings and offer us the blatant, troubling truth. You win... my underpants.
Utility kilt is comfortable and easy to wear.you can read this post. it is a good informative post on yours -- Tactical Kilt
This 'guy' keeps leaving promos for his 'tactical' kilt store. He's so desperate that he wrote some code to circumvent Blogger's bot filter. Please buy his items or he mightn't be able to buy machine oil and bolts for his leaking metal groin. Thank you.
Cannot contact reCAPTCHA. Check your connection and try again -- 龙大猫
Meanwhile, the above dude circumvented our CAPTCHA just to say that. What a waste, I wanted to hear about Libyan Rolexes and Nike handbags for the 1,000th time!
The coldest places are not the Arctic that is where the person does not have. Xbox -- Simuka Rafeal
A tricky riddle to solve, but I think he's trying to say that Norway sucks. And it comes to something when you can't sell XBOXes to Scandinavia.
monkey kate spade outlet online nike lunarglide coach factory -- Dong Dong23
I think I understand how these messages work now! The bots have realised that we are keeping the silliest ones for their sheer comedy value, and have started competing for the title of 'stupidest comment'. Any humans reading this have no chance of winning, so you'd better just forget those dreams of becoming a famous Internet writer.

Quickies
  • "Thanks for sharing Ishqbaaz" -- Singh. (This perfectionist deleted his post and reposted it after spotting his spelling errors. Better watch out, these bots are becoming more intelligent.)
  •  "My brother recommended I might like this website. He used to be entirely right" -- Taufik Setiawan. (That's right - he *used* to be, until Illogiblog stopped posting in 2016.) 
  • "Click here Click here Click here Click here" -- Neeti Kumar. (I clicked but did not receive a free holiday to my house. I requested my click back.) 

Cheers, guys! All 2,000 spam messages from the period 2016-2018 have been deleted. To help prevent future spam, all new comments on posts older than 90 days will now be manually moderated.

Until our next dumpster fire, enjoy your hampork-hybrid lunchmeats. Chow and indeed ciao.

Thursday 31 March 2016

Illogicopedia endorses Donald Trump

 My fellow Illogicopedians,

I have long advocated for Illogicopedia to stand above the political fray, and get involved only in issues of vital importance, like establishing a research grant to develop invisible tube socks for astronaut giraffes. Where would we be if giraffes in space had to go bare-hooved, or were forced to appear to other space giraffes like they were not bare-hooved? Either alternative would be intolerable to a humane society.

However, we have faced a decline of the Illogicopedian community recently. We have lost much of what made Illogicopedia Illogicopedia. It seems that no one has their priorities in order. Those poor space giraffes! This will require us to compromise and join the political fray just this once.

On this one day of the year, I believe we should all be able to come together across party lines and nationalities to agree that there is only one candidate who upholds the principles our community stands for.

There is an answer, and that answer is Donald Trump. Donald Trump promises to put a freeze on Goth visitors entering our web site. This will help decrease our depression and angst levels. Also, he has promised to build a wall around our web site and then make Uncyclopedia pay the costs of constructing the wall. Donald Trump's common-sense solutions are exactly what we need to make Illogicopedia great again!

-- Nerd42

Wednesday 25 November 2015

The 30,000 spammers

I can only delete 100 spam comments at a time? Oh dear, looks like I'm gonna have to book a decade off work...


Fetch the extra large bag of Monster Munch!

Thursday 2 July 2015

We beat Sherpa Image to press with this one

Users at Illogicopedia have recently been accused of snorting Aspercreme with Lidocaine during an after-party for an Australian Rules Power Jousting tournament. Lawyers for the survivors claim none of the entrants were warned of the unusually dense populations huge mutant creatures, due in part to the unusually harsh preceding winter.

Minister for Tabernakian Pyramid Schemes Sir Humphrey Loughton-Bailiwick, announced plans today for an International Croissant Consortium to be established for the preservation of baffling Newtonian groupers. Administrators and bureaucrats hastened to attach themselves to this whopper boondoggle, this exercise in jiggery-pokery, this affront to Nature herself, like lampreys to sharks, like lemons to sharts. Combined, once again, with hoisin sauce, a poultice was made from bedsheets and applied physically to Msr. Flute Charpentier.

Having been to seminary, the Earl new better faster than old less good, and thus his legacy was born. During his semi-cloistered life, many things were taught to him that were denied others. Ancient occult knowledge passed down from knee-jerk to palindrome, as wolves descend from the knee hills to work their murder on jack-booted nutria ranchers.

Lorenz was late this morning because gear wheels hit the bent steamer at 78 mph. To their credit, soldiers and bookies gathered at the docks, handing out posters of David Lee Roth, solar powered muskrats, inflatable Nazi paraphenalia and swamp gas sightings. Dougie had to go into town to get more litmus paper. Urged to float a loan for water sheds, the new VP for Skulking Anthony Plumbob "borrowed" from the pension fund and sat on a vibrating stump for three weeks.

In other News, plastic is the new black. Genies are flying out of Donald Trump's ass. Ax wielding mimes restormed the Bastille in an effort to push through national funding for  giant iguana breeding. Invisible Corsicans have secured the right to be insane during business hours. Rain gear has been outlawed in 66 members nations of the UN today in what's been perceived to be a move on coffee futures.

Saturday 16 May 2015

No! Don't take that pill!

Professional apoplectic and union gooch bedazzler Warren Leaky-Blemish had decided to use the minions at his disposal to eradicate Illogicopedia. He has failed profoundly.

Binging on Red Lobster the night before had a deleterious effect on his plans to contract ADHD. Buckets of yoz.

Smell the torts! Sniff them well! For they may whiff of toothpaste laden with antifreeze.

Sylvia joined the Army, just like those assholes at her high school said she would. Languages were her gateway to bigger, better things. Farsi, Mandarin, Finnish, Mandinko... the list went on to the wee wee hours, when she had to pee a lot.

Often elephants would grow an extra set of tusks,  just to show how badassed they are. Once more, into the breach!

If you had iguana lips, your mom would still love you.

Wednesday 1 April 2015

Illogicopedia closing

It is with a heavy heart that I must announce the closure of Illogicopedia. As you may be aware, our hosting is funded from donations, some of which came from Russia and due to recent upheavals in the global economy, that funding source has been cut off. Apparently the funds had been transferred through a Ukranian bank which has since been seized by the Putin regime. Anyway, it's too late to fix it at this point. We have already gone so long without paying that Roberto, our hosting provider, has stated that he will be unplugging the servers and deleting all our content sometime tomorrow even if we were to pay our bills.

Looking forward, discussions among the Illogicopedia community have yielded mixed results. A consensus seems to have emerged that the decline in participation in recent months and years was due to burnout on the concept of illogical silly content, and that the community should probably switch gears to actually help with bringing the world useful information instead. To this end, plans have been set in motion to launch a new site called Logicopedia. Registration for this exciting new opportunity will begin soon. Stay subscribed to the IllogiBlog for further updates!

-- Nerd42