Who...

...the feck are those new red-link users? And why the hellk are they making huge random articles that link to Wikipedia? Also, where am I? Who am I? And why the feck am I chained up and wearing a thong?

Er, nevermind about that, let's just get this show on the road. Now, we have a few sneaky sneakers scoping around the site writing crap without bothering to make it look nice. Creating such articles as Wallace Intrubé, The Snickets and others, should these anons editors be considered subtle threats or a gleam of hope in a slow wiki? The creepers themselves:

1. Specsy1: A cheap chump who was the first to join. More than likely associated with following counterpart.
2. Sammy12345: Do I have a fan club? Copying the name. More than likely partner in crime of above.
3. Shitload of IP's: Mindless zombie henchmen of the two schemers above. Watch out for full on wiki domination by the cohorts.

Testes, Seppy: arm the banhammers: if these guys invade the forums you know what to do.

But the other obvious question lingers: What if they're just innocent bystanders, trying to write and have fun? Well, in that case, we make them snap into shape by throwing death threats to them on their talk pages. They need to learn how to link and make some userpages. And if they don't cooperate? Well, I already mentioned the solution one paragraph above.

But enough about me. Let's get into the fun stuff: The wiki is horribly inactive, no one is editing, blah blah blah . But, let's face it, these red link arseholes are the only ones giving the site some value. Maybe they're not evil schemers, but silent heroes? Ah, forget it. I need some more cocaine.

Illogicopedia welcomes its newest Werewolf

Ladies and gentlemen, please put your hand together for our newest admin... THE (pictured right, bringing it on down).

This is actually the first administrator to be appointed in a very long time, maybe even a year. Now before you go moaning about how you should have been chosen instead, let me explain the reasoning behind this promotion.

We need fresh meat to chew. Simple as that.

Naw, only joking, though I would beware of an increase in impromptu werewolf attacks. We actually wanted someone else to help out with administrative stuff around the site, namely keeping up to date with the features.

As you may know, Illogic has experienced an upsurge in activity in the last week or so, which coincides with the more frequent featuring of articles. During the first few months of the year there simply were no admins around to keep the site ticking over, hence no IOTM for November and, like, three features in three months.

Hopefully, this won't happen again, and to further combat a repeated staleness we may look to appoint yet another admin further down the line. But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Congratulations, THE!