Celebrating the Holy Festival of 5 Bananas

Simply as a matter of convenience, the reunleashing of the IllogiTurtles took place this morning, Eastern Standard Time.  Careening dangerously around corners in their modified golf cart of vengeance, this didactic duo promulgates the Word that is... Illogic (eeble sonk). According to the Book Of All That Be Banana, today is the Holy Festival of 5 Bananas, and we will celebrate accordingly.

First, let me warn readers that they should not approach these messengers from the beyond casually, or at all, if possible.  They can do horrible things with bananas... horrible! 

Secondly, once you start eating the bananas, do not stop until you have consumed 5, or a multiple of 5. Otherwise, Bonjook will be displeased, and will dispatch a minotaur to decapitate your family. 

That's it, then. Happy Holy Feast of 5 Bananas and we'll speak again during Retractable Landing Gear week.

Is Illogiblog really that bad?

It has come to our attention here at Illogiblog that reading much of the content here is a lot like being sprayed by owl vomit. Well, not vomit precisely, but whatever is in the picture (right), it's certainly more than just water. So, if that's what my writing is doing to you, poor dear readers, I say, "What's wrong with you, subjecting yourself to such drivel? Are you some kind of lab experiment with an inconceivable tolerance for crap?!"

In back country Finland, watching owls projectile vomit is considered a sport. Villages compete for distance records, number of horks per event, number of humans caused to throw up because of the spectacle and other obscure and untranslatable awards having to do with lots of snow and caribou.

Well, I don't know about you, but I learned something today.

SysopDog is not amused

In a previous post/comment, Nerd talked about having withdrawal symptoms from Illogicopedia. Well, it hasn't been that bad here at Hindleyak Towers - so far I have only lost three toes and a finger whilst playing around with a hacksaw. If only Illogicopedia was up, then I could spend my time more effectively...

The continued server outage -- yep, I checked this morning and Roberto is still sat there with his air rifle -- means that for the moment we have to put up with things like YouTube and (gasp) Uncyclopedia instead, which, as you can imagine, isn't really that good for the soul. Not that Illogicopedia is, but at least it doesn't waste your brain cells in the same way as some video of a cat speaking (please don't watch it).

Sorry for this inconvenience, but please bear with us while we try to find the problem and extinguish whatever is ravaging the servers. My money is on a large rat infestation, or perhaps a Wikia sabotage attempt. The fiends! I shall dispatch of them with my trusty Swiss Army knife, blunted by repeated usage on brick walls (damn hallucinations).

Thank goodness for off-site blogs in times like these! Otherwise you may have thought Illogicopedia had died, never to return... a world in which we do not want to live, I'm sure you'll agree.

Pointless word of the week: Aggrandisement
Sandwich filling of the week: Potato waffles
Website of the week: Newsarse