Illogicopedia users "a bunch of illiterates": Alexa

In a scathing attack on Illogicopedia's userbase, internet ranking site Alexa.com has blasted the site's editors as a load of infertile slackers with no education:

Based on internet averages, illogicopedia.org is visited more frequently by males who are in the age range 18-24, have no children, have no college education and browse this site from home. -- Alexa.com entry for Illogicopedia

Users became outraged upon hearing the news, which was reported some time ago but hasn't reached the Illogicopedia community until now because we couldn't get anyone to read it out loud for us. Thanks to Microsoft Sam, I was able to decipher these sticks and squiggles known as 'letters' that go together to form 'words' to bring you this belated exclusive.

In response, it must be said that most workplaces immediately put Illogicopedia on the internet blacklist due to its nonsensical, brain-melting content. We would otherwise access the site at work, but the computers are generally more than 20 years old and still on dial-up connections; to rub it in, we struggle to control those horrible one-button mice from the late 80s.

The remaining accusations are somewhat fair, so I shall gloss over them and try to tempt you with the promise of a free online diploma for all Illogiblog readers here. Well, what have you got to lose? Illogicopedia has already deprived you of your sanity.