Semi-Annual Illogicopedia Membership Drive

Well, it's that time of year again—the time when our brethren and sistren at another, unnamed competing wiki, burn scores of unloved articles to the ground during their bimonthly Forest Fire Week event. If you're a lover of great illiterature, that means that in all likelihood you'll be mourning the loss of a loved one, or a loved one's loved one, by early next week.

That said, this is a fortuitous time to remind you that here at Illogicopedia we have a more generous eye toward total quality. Our dedicated volunteer administrators and support staff can really sense the affection you feel for your compositions, so we're willing to stand back and provide adequate berth to allow your writings to come to their full fruition.

Granted, in most cases this will lead to them accumulating mold, termites or dry rot, falling into disfavour, disuse and disrepute, and eventually fading away into complete obscurity... but at least they'll still be there to show your children someday: "My God did I really write that? I'm truly sorry. It was a phase I was going through, apparently. This is why I've pushed you so hard to get a good education."

Criticism. Rejection. We understand. It hurts less when it comes from yourself.

Our annual membership drive begins in full force on Monday, but Ops will be standing by starting this Friday, waiting to welcome you home at illogicopedia.org. Be sure to ask for your complimentary welcome template. Supplies are limited.